MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS

(A.k.a. MASSAGE PARLOR HOOKERS; MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS!)

The onscreen title is MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS! (note the exclamation mark).

When Rosie (Chris Jordan) has her face smashed into a mirror and is strangled by a client at the New York massage parlour where she works, tough cops O'Mara (John Moser) and Rizotti (George Spencer) are assigned to the case.

Rizotti is particularly incensed by the sight of Rosie's corpse, as he was just screwing her earlier that morning. Only. don't tell his wife! Unsurprisingly, he gives their first suspect - Rosie's weirdest client, the pervy Mr Creepy (George Dzundza) - a good hiding. But while he's busy doing that, the killer strikes again at another parlour.

While Rizotti scours the sidewalks of 42nd Street and randomly narrates how "there sure is a lot of sick weirdoes in this town", O'Mara begins a relationship with Rosie's flatmate, Gwen (Sandra Peabody).

The killings continue as Rizotti's marriage feels the strain and the detectives intensify their investigations around Times Square's seedier establishments. Can they end the reign of terror before the killer's diabolical mission has been completed?

Largely forgotten about since its spotty run on the US grindhouse circuit during the 1970s, Chester Fox and Alex Stevens' MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS boasts skid row production values and all the finesse of a Herschell Gordon Lewis film. Indeed, on the surface of it, the plot even bares similarities to THE GORE GORE GIRLS.

Short at little under 80 minutes in length, the film is however a tad slow in-between its rudimentary murder set-pieces and copious moments of female nudity. The crude handheld camerawork does lend the otherwise flat dialogue scenes some life, and it's nice to see location footage shot on 42nd Street which affords glimpses of notices for INVASION OF THE BLOOD FARMERS, DEADLY CHINA DOLL and so on. But none of this can alter the fact that the film does drag at times. In line with the aforementioned Lewis' films, a lack of directorial prowess dictates that there is an absence of any incremental pace or tension as the mystery unfolds.

Even so, the leads are quite endearing despite their limited thespian abilities, and there's an undeniable charm to the no-budget chic of the early 70s linking scenes (at times it's like we're watching the inspiration for Beastie Boys' "Sabotage" video).

The gore quotient is pretty low as is the sleaze factor, but MURDERS still provides enough cheap delights to satisfy the curious: loads of female skin on display, a wonderfully of-its-time jazz-rock soundtrack, a plot that vaguely foreshadows SEVEN, the interesting inclusions of Peabody (Mari from THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT), Brother Theodore (THE 'BURBS) Beverly Bonner (BASKET CASE) and Dzundza (BASIC INSTINCT, CRIMSON TIDE etc) in its cast, and a memorably bizarre final few minutes.

And, who can fail to love a film in which a cop takes part in a high-speed car chase wearing nothing but a towel?

Vinegar Syndrome are new kids on the DVD/blu-ray block, having made an auspicious debut in January with their dual format release of three early Herschell Gordon Lewis films (ECSTASIES OF WOMEN, LINDA AND ABILENE and BLACK LOVE). Since then, they�ve devoted their time to releasing some genuinely exciting obscurities onto DVD � CONFESSIONS, ANATOMY OF A PSYCHO etc � and have now dipped back into dual format territory with the worldwide blu-ray/DVD premiere of MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS.

Considering how unseen this film has largely remained over the last 40 years, it looks absurdly good on the region-free blu-ray disc. Presented in a 1080p HD transfer which preserves the original 1.85:1 aspect ratio, the 16mm print used for this 2K restoration job is surprisingly clean and allows for exceptional clarity in terms of colour, detail and nicely filmic texture. Blacks are solid as they should be with no trace of compression, flesh-tones are authentic for the duration and outdoor scenes are so vivid that they really are remarkable. This really is a spiffing presentation.

The English LPCM 2.0 audio is a tad less impressive, exhibiting the occasional muffled effect and some minor background hiss on occasion. It�s certainly not a bad audio track � all dialogue and music are perfectly audible and equally balanced � but, when weighed against the sterling picture quality, the audio track has definitely aged worse.

The disc opens to a static main menu page. From there, a pop-up scene selection menu allows access to the film via 5 chapters.

MASSAGE PARLOR MURDERS received a second lease of life in the late 70s when it was re-released onto the drive-in circuit as MASSAGE PARLOR HOOKERS. The distributors removed the opening 7-minute pre-credits sequence (an exchange between a parlour client - played by co-director Fox - and a masseur). This alternate cut is also featured, in HD, on this disc.

Of the remaining bonus features, the best is 8 minutes of outtakes which � although somewhat scratchy at times � generally look very good and offer a lot more nudity. That they exist in this format at all is something of a revelation. They're accompanied here by lounge music.

Original trailers for both the film�s original release (just under 3 minutes in length) and its re-release (2 minutes) are also proffered. The narrator on the former sounds like the same person who reads aloud the opening text on THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE. At one point he compares the film to PSYCHO, which is tantamount to outrageous bullshitting. The latter trailer plays more towards the film's erotic side.

A radio spot is also advertised on the disc's extras menu but when I clicked on this I simply got a screen with two original theatrical posters for the film and no audio.

Finally, we get an excellent collector's booklet with informative liner notes from Temple of Schlock's Chris Poggiali and a card reproduction of the instructions made by distributors to excise reel 1 from the film's re-release.

The second disc in this set is a DVD which contains all the same material as above, in standard definition. Both discs are region free.

All in all, Vinegar Syndrome continue to impress with another excellent release of a recently rediscovered gem from the 70s drive-in circuit.

Review by Stuart Willis