GIALLO

It's early Tuesday morning as I make my way into the press screening for Dario Argento's latest opus GIALLO - there's been a growing feeling of anticipation and even some excitement ahead of this one, sure there's been an undercurrent of dissatisfaction of his recent output from fans but surely a movie titled GIALLO by the man himself would not disappoint? I'll admit as the lights went down there was a nagging doubt, more so as I questioned just why this movie would be receiving its World Premiere in Edinburgh? Then why should it not considering several of his previous movies (Do You Like Hitchcock, Non Ho Sonno and Phantom Of The Opera) all received their UK premieres here at the Dead By Dawn Festival. Interesting to note no matter what, the press were out in force for this particular screening so fingers were crossed�

The film opens in Milan as we see a hooded taxi driver abduct a young attractive foreign girl by drugging her (syringe in the eye) in the back of his cab so he can take her back to his underground dwelling for some mutilation fun. Following another swift abduction (this time of a glamorous fashion model) we're introduced to Inspector Enzo Avolfi (played by award winning wooden actor Adrien Brody) who we find has been working solo on tracking down the aforementioned taxi serial killer though clearly with no success. In fact all Inspector Avolfi seems to be doing all the time the body count of mutilated babes continues to grow is gawp wistfully at their disfigured pictures whilst eating pizza and smoking cigarettes, so it's perhaps somewhat lucky for him (and us all) that the sister of the abducted fashion model Linda (played with believable growing levels of frustration by the talented Emmanuelle Seigner) shows up to shake the plot forward with some paint by numbers detection work.

The remainder of the film plays out as a (so called) 'race against time' as Linda and Avolfi try to find the killer before Linda's sisters body turns up. Tragically, said plot feels like it has been drafted quickly over a beer on the back of a cigarette packet and whilst laughably the press materials that went out for the screening made references to the film being a 'complex puzzle' that would only be the case if you were a one year old tackling a six piece jigsaw (seriously, this makes an episode of Taggart seem like a Hitchcockian plot twisting classic)..

Tragically it is perhaps time that Argento retired. Sure GIALLO is not as bad as say The Card Player but it's still a deeply disappointing and frustrating movie - so much so that at points I went from wriggling frustration to downright angry at the lazy script and plot devices that made no common sense whatsoever (would you, when fleeing from a serial killer flee from ground level open air and head up a narrow stairwell or would you believe that after violently murdering someone in front of a policeman that they would let you go free after you 'explained' why you had done so, fuck no) but I suppose the blame for such ridiculous plot devices should lay firmly on the hands of inexperienced scripters Agnew and Keller (though why these folk are let loose on work with someone like Argento I just dont know?!)

Dario though doesn't come off lightly, anyone expecting a revisit of his early visual flair in a film called GIALLO will be sorely disappointed. Whilst at times he does move the camera (thankfully more so than the static close up frenzy of The Card Player) it's just not an inspired use at any time. In fact I'd ask any Argento fanatic to be honest with themselves and try watching GIALLO as if it had not been made by Argento and ask themselves what they truly think? In honesty for me, it feels like one of those substandard throwaway 1980's giallo rip offs, not too dissimilar in feel to Luigi Cozzi's Black Cat (though with apologies to Cozzi as his earlier The Killer Must Kill Again is light years better than GIALLO). Sure there's some gore on show, with thanks as ever to the great Sergio Stivaletti, which whilst saves the film from crashing horribly brings nothing fresh or exciting to the table like Argento's earlier films (whilst graphic at times would look reasonably pedestrian in the majority of most mainstream genre movies).

The acting is broadly embarrassing, Brody as Inspector Avolfi has the presence of a wooden glove puppet (albeit one with slick hair and a cigarette hanging from its mouth) whilst lead baddie Yellow (Byron Deidra) comes across like a European jaundiced mix of ratty Arthur Coddish (Brion James) from Raimi's Crimewave and a poor man's Frank Zito (Joe Spinell) from Maniac - the problem being that watching them perform you'll just pine for greater things (such as the aforementioned Maniac or earlier Argento treats such as Tenebrae) to cleanse yourself from the middling drivel that's just unfolded onscreen. Mention should also be made of the soundtrack by Marco Werba which at times is quite interesting and reminiscent of old British B movie horror scores of the 1970's (part Bernard Hermann inspired but over used to display thrills when there's none there to behold).

As ever, I expect nothing that I've said will dissuade the legions of Argento's blinded fans from marching to the front of the queue to watch this movie (who in turn will also likely latch onto the merest glimmer of hope from what they've viewed, whether that be some gore or just the reference to the yellow giallo of lore) and yes I too will likely be there front of line at the next Argento movie release screening (waiting for the inevitable disappointment yet again) and whilst I always live in hope there's a part of me that wishes for no more. Shame.

Review by Alan Simpson